These Are The Only Kinds Of Friends Nigerian Parents Approve Of

June 27, 2018

We all know Nigerian parents are hard to impress especially when it comes to approving of the kind of friends you have.

All your friends are bad gang and nobody is good enough to be friends with you except these 10 people.

The ones that have two heads and used to come first in class when you were coming second.

Your own friends were coming third and fourth and you wonder why you didn’t reach  JAMB cut off for Medicine.

The ones that will join you to do housework when they come and visit.

Not the ones without home training that’ll just cross leg in front of the T.V.

The one whose future ambition was either to be a doctor, lawyer, engineer or pastor.

Dazzal the ones who chose any other professions were destined to end up as failures and your parents didn’t want you to associate with failures.

The one whose two knees touched the ground or who laid flat on the ground when they were greeting them.

Ehen omo dada.

The church worker that’s also in the choir and is a youth leader and teaches Sunday school too.

The only thing that’s remaining is for them to open their own church.

The one that only comes over when you people have assignment to do together.

Unlike the ones that’ll come and be using you are your destiny to play video games.

The friends that barbed skin, used to write names of noise makers and wore their trousers like this.

They were always class captain.

That friend that has never had sex, doesn’t know the meaning of sex and never plans on having sex.

In fact they don’t even know what alcohol is.

The friend that works in Shell, Mobil or Chevron and has already built a house for their parents.

While you, you are still there going home every weekend to beg your mummy for stew.

The ones that graduated at 21 with a first class and immediately got married and had three children.

You are there denying your parents of the chance to hold their grand children already.

And finally the one with responsible parents like themselves.

Because it’s only responsible parents that can have responsible children.

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

February 5, 2020

In no particular order, the top three feelings in the world are: Receiving credit alerts Having a test cancelled that you didn’t prepare for Staying home the whole weekend after cancelling plans with the 7 friends and two family members you swore you’d hang out with. Now money in undefeated and that test thing is […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

happy black woman
November 26, 2021

Women already have a list of things they spend their salary on and before you know it, salary don finish. How about we choose things to do for ourselves on payday to maximize enjoyment? Here’s a list of payday ideas for Nigerian women:

Recommended Quizzes

November 30, 2019

With No Nut November FINALLY coming to an end, we’ve decided to mark the torturous month with some more horny content. After quizzes that guessed how many people you’ve slept with, how good you are in bed and who you’ll sleep with next, this one will guess when next you’ll get lucky. Take it to […]

More from General

August 27, 2021

Nigeria’s leading dishwashing liquid, Morning Fresh, has unveiled Tolani Tayo-Osikoya, a successful Chef, Food Blogger and Owner of Diary of a Kitchen Lover, as its new brand ambassador.  Prior to the unveil, Tolani had been sharing the inspiring story of her journey on her social media platforms, reassuring Nigerians that dreams are valid even in […]

August 5, 2021

When it comes to games night ideas you can play with friends, it is best to consider the people you’ll be inviting so you can choose games that each person will enjoy. Not every time truth or dare, or never have I ever. Here are 8 game night ideas you can play with your friends. […]

July 15, 2021

The University authorities released a statement addressing the rise of Covid-19 cases in UNILAG on Tuesday after this tweet was made. Huh ??? Covid outbreak in Unilag  ??? https://t.co/LbH5Xv3nM7 – Jahmal (@JahmalUsen) July 12. 2021 The statement reads, Read more here. School activities were going on as normal, even after several Covid-19 positive students were […]

July 15, 2021

What do you do before you breakup with someone? Well, you should try out any of these seven things. 1) Eat A hungry man is an angry man. So sometimes the reason you want to break up with your partner is because you’ve not had some good food in a while. Before you type that […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X